How to Befriend your Self

Befriend Your Self: The Transformative Power of Yoga Beyond the Mat

A Friendly Chat with You 

Hey, I’m back to have a chat about the transformative effects of practice and how to befriend your Self to heal your wounds, illness, disconnect and limitations.

You see, a lot of folks rock up at my studio with a few boxes to check – better sleep, less anxiety, to release a dodgy hip or soothe an aching back. 

All great goals that can be achieved with practice. But this quite frankly is low hanging fruit.  

Picking at it won’t get to the root of what got caused the problems. And that’s why I’m not about simply offering you low hanging fruit. 

Our practices at this studio are complete and cover the full scope of Yoga. I don’t expect you to understand what that means right now, but this might help. 


The Burnout Breakthrough: How I Befriended Myself 

10 years ago when my kids were still in school and I was hanging on to a profession in journalism doing excessive exercise to ‘destress’ I found myself constantly exhausted. I’d burnt out. My relationships were suffering, I felt disconnected from myself and on a friend’s recommendation I took up yoga.  

Initially the idea was it’d deliver me back to the life I’d thought I’d so perfectly created. But it wasn’t long before I had the epiphany. That this was far from a perfect life. I had been neglecting my own needs in the pursuit of success that really wasn’t feeling like success and was really more about meeting the needs and success of others.  

And in the process I had lost a sense of who I was. This realisation was a turning point. I realised that to befriend your Self is the key to inner and outer wealth, so I needed to discover myself again.

You see, the quality of our friendships can make or break our wellbeing – especially the one we have with ourself.  

So, let’s get stuck into how yoga can help us become our own best friend and, by doing so, also transform our connections with others. 

The Journey Beyond the Mat 

First I need you maybe re-think what it is to practice. Not another fitness trend, but a journey of self-discovery. You could think of it as the ultimate quest to befriend your Self, where the prize is an unshakeable bond with yourself. 

Here’s how Yoga teaches this stuff. Be warned Sanskrit terms are part of the deal! You are more than capable of learning new words. So I’m not about to shy away from teaching you them. 

Addressing the Kleshas: Understanding Yoga’s Deeper Teachings 

  1. Avidya (Ignorance of the True Self):Most of us are blissfully unaware of who we really are. We get so caught up in roles and labels—mum, dad, boss, whatever—that we forget there’s a unique, beautiful soul underneath it all. Yoga peels back these layers of ignorance and helps you see your true self. Imagine meeting the real you—sounds like a date worth keeping, doesn’t it? 

  1. Asmita (Identification with the Ego): Ah, the ego. That pesky little thing that makes us say, “I’m not good enough,” or “I must be perfect.” Through yoga, we learn to spot the ego’s tricks and take its power away. It’s like telling your inner critic to take a hike and welcoming your true self to the party. 

  1. Raga and Dvesha (Attachments and Aversions):We’re all guilty of chasing after pleasure and running from discomfort. Yoga teaches us to embrace every moment—whether it’s a joyous celebration or a teary-eyed evening. Think of it as opening the door to every guest in your life and saying, “Welcome, let’s have a cuppa.” 

  2. Abhinivesha (Clinging to Life): We all have a deep fear rooted in our primal need to survive… a fear of death. What we forget is death is a part of life, it’s a cycle we are a part of and by clinging to our physical life we allow fear to rule us. Limiting ourselves to avoid something inevitable, and forgetting that we are not just this physical existance. Yoga reminds us we go on beyond our physical existance, we are infinite!

Breaking Free and Embracing the Journey 

Our studio is all about helping you embrace every experience, every emotion, and every insight. Here’s how we do it: 

Welcoming Every Moment: On the mat, we invite you to greet each moment with open arms. Whether you’re feeling on top of the world or in the doldrums, every feeling has a place. Imagine if we treated ourselves with the same kindness we show to a dear friend—what a difference that would make! 

Sustainable Progress with Hatha Yoga:We guide you through Hatha Yoga’s progression, ensuring your journey is safe and sustainable. This isn’t a race; it’s a delightful stroll where you get to shed those heavy restrictions and discover the lighter, freer you beneath. 

Befriending Yourself and Enhancing Your Life 

Making a date with yourself is a brilliant act of self-love. Through yoga, you nurture this relationship, gradually unveiling your true potential. 

How Lack of Self-Friendship Shows Up: 

  • Negative Self-Talk: You wouldn’t dream of speaking to a friend the way you sometimes speak to yourself, would you? 

  • Self-Sabotage:Those moments when you hold yourself back from joy or success because deep down, you don’t believe you deserve it. 

  • Feeling Disconnected:Struggling to connect with others on a deeper level because you’re not in tune with yourself. 

How Life Improves with these Teachings: 

  • Positive Self-Image: By recognising and challenging negative thoughts, you begin to see yourself in a kinder light. 

  • Empowerment: You start making choices that align with your true desires and values, not what you think others expect of you. 

  • Deeper Connections: As you become more authentic, you attract and foster more genuine relationships with others. 

Transforming Friendships Through Yoga and Self-Discovery 

For those of you who value friendship but find the modern world a tad isolating, these teachings can help break through the surface-level connections. Here’s how yoga can give you the tools to make real friends: 

Authenticity: By understanding and embracing your true self, you become more authentic. Authenticity is magnetic—it attracts genuine connections. 

Empathy and Understanding:Yoga fosters empathy. As you learn to accept and love yourself, you extend that same compassion to others. This deepens your connections and helps you forge lasting friendships. 

Presence:Through mindfulness practices, you become more present. This means truly listening and engaging with others, making your interactions more meaningful. 


In a world that often feels disconnected, taking the time to befriend your Self in a deep and meaningful way is more important than ever. Yoga offers a path to this self-discovery, providing tools and practices to explore beyond the physical postures and meditation. By addressing the Kleshas and embracing each moment, you can break free from unconscious patterns, cultivate peace, and ultimately transform your life. 

So, lovely yogis, let’s make a date with ourselves, nurture our inner relationship, and unveil the limitless possibilities that await us. Remember, the journey of befriending your true self is one of the most rewarding paths you can take. Namaste.