My very gorgeous friend once told me that sometimes life has to hollow you out before it can fill you up again.
Just over a month ago I hollowed out. On Tuesday, October 29 I resigned from my job. I walked away from a career that I once thought defined me. With no net. Do not pass go – do not collect redundancy, or a shiny new, better, more well paid/lower paid, alternative.
So what now? All moments leading up to this moment have been occupied pursuing, building, cultivating, living, breathing and grasping onto this job status. The lovely Deepak Chopra might say I sowed a seed of intention to be a journalist 28 years ago. Since then I’ve given it my full attention and, sure enough, my seed grew. Seems my ego grew with it though – as did fear. Fear of change, fear of losing me – to the point where even when a role I normally love was making me ill, I couldn’t let it go.
‘I am a journalist’. Now ‘I’m an unemployed journalist’. But actually, yoga has taught me I am neither. They are just labels that can fall off in the wash cycle of life.
Have faith, you know you are safe
In Deepak’s book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Yoga he talks about the Second Branch of Yoga Niyama. Niyama encourages five qualities to live your life by and that can be derived from your connection to spirit. The fifth Niyama is Ishwara-Prandihana and encourages us to surrender to the divine, God, the universe – to have faith. I’ve been reading his story about enjoying the roller coaster ride because despite the turbulence, you have faith, you know you are safe. It’s having a deep connection to your spirit enables you to surrender to the unknown and know you will be ok whatever the outcome.